Monday, December 17, 2012

Shattered Oaths

I really did promise myself that it would just be a short term situation.  A one time occurrence.  Everything should have returned to normal after one night, perhaps two, three at the absolute most.  But then how it's my current pickle explained? I'm feeling outrageously tired now, like I could simply fall over at any moment and arrive in dreamland while still in motion.  Earlier, I fell asleep on the forward and return trips to my violin lesson.  And I usually do doze off on those trips, but today was all out sleep where I noticed nothing around me.  This really needs to stop.  After all, it's finals week.

Maybe I didn't give the previous tests my complete attention.  And maybe all the tests turned out all right last week.  But finals.  That is around 20% of my grade in each class right there.  Am I going senile? I've told myself multiple multiple times that manga, anime, all of that nonsense could wait until winter break before I go under.  And dramas.  Especially dramas.

It's just a measly four days away from freedom though, so what am I doing? Why reading manga, crying over Lelouch, and giggling idiotically over the new Hana Kimi of course.  Goodness.  I must have a death wish.  This is really one of the busiest times of the year and here I am, wasting away time as though trying to make up for being (relatively) good this semester.  The Biology Open? Summer program applications? Dance performance? Violin audition? FINALS? Pshhh.  They've got nothing on me.

Right.  My mind's definitely crazy.

I've been sleeping around 3:30 for more than a week now.  Why? A person who loves sleeping as much as me.  Who hates waking up as much as me.  Why can't I make myself sleep earlier? I get this nagging feeling nowadays if I sleep before midnight telling me that I could be losing myself in the Internet instead of wasting time sleeping.  Geez.  What's up and what's down?

And today..I ate so much chocolate too.  After I said that I would be good and try to eat more fruits and veggies from now on...

Crazy.  Totally.

Anyways, on a better note.  I got my PSAT scores back on Friday!!!! Hehe, I exceeded all of my greatest hopes and my mom's highest expectations! A 237!!! Wooooo ;)

(Of course, she automatically set even higher standards for me to met, so technically I never met her expectations, but yeah.)

Anddd, I'm actually going to turn my laptop off now.  Throw it into the hall in order to avoid temptation.  Glance over my econ notes.  And sleep like the dead.